Disclosure

As the world is ever turning,
And my soul continues burning,
From deep down the heart that wants,
Past memories that shame and haunt,
Believing I'm lost only to find,
Everyone else has left me behind,
For the sake of the damage I brought,
And the lies in which I've been caught,
Too many times am I lonely at night,
Trying to abate my ever growing fright,
This crusade of fighting the isolation,
Too destitute to find any foundation,
As those hopes and dreams slip away,
Worse still into the harsh light of day,
Ever lonely I seek to discover,
The hope of love within another,
Perceiving the very darkness I fear,
In the people I've held so near,
I cry and I ache for the pain to subside,
Only to find deep down inside,
Through the seeping darkness above,
I have to believe I am worthy of love.

Seasons of Heartache

This time we are all breaking,
My heart in rhythm of his,
I'm in the season of aching,
I can't do better than this.

If I sink further down in myself,
I'll never be found again,
Placing my heart on the highest shelf,
Only to see if I don't have to begin.

Beating myself up to pieces,
Trying to make it better,
The way my heartbeat ceases,
Remembering you and I together.

Seasons of pain in everything I do,
More pain than I've ever known,
Heartache to me is nothing new,
But I've never been this alone.

Caught

Caught somewhere in the middle,

Roughly treated like a sinner,

For the mistakes of an entire body,

Crammed down to an ingrained society.

For them treating you like a leper,

And they will never treat you better,

Just because of a woman's heart,

Never knowing it would fall apart.

For what it's worth you are more,

Regretting it still as I walk out the door,

Yes, flawed and ruined nonetheless,

To us our lives would have been perfect bliss.

I'm sorry for the way we turned out,

Your head was spinning round about,

Love cannot love under such disdain,

Of the way you are shackled in chains.

My life is my own I promise you that,

But to you and I seemingly mistreat,

We weren't an exception we are scarred,

And I'm so sorry it had to be this hard.

The Coldest Truth

Follow me into the deep dark,
Words we trapped in tight lips,
All for a better tomorrow,
Feigned because we need to believe.

A dream better than our reality,
Shallow and hallow down inside,
Because we broke too many times,
We can't confront our reflection.

I'm born a beautiful little sinner,
You're born a broken lost boy,
We broke the codes of realism,
And broke ourselves to do so.

Turn us around and crash us down,
Follow me again to a broken road,
I can crush your heart in front of you,
And then console you as you ache.

No more mornings no more adoration,
We tore up our own promises again,
I trusted you with every piece of me,
Now I collide with reality once more.

One Year

How many days did you say you wanted? Forever?
Three hundred and sixty five days to remember.

Broken and torn up crying in my bed,
Every little word running rampant through my head.

I swear the night has never looked this black,
Until the night that you would never be coming back.

I'm never going to say I regret my year with you,
You made me happy and always told me the truth.

But in this moment we are at the hardest part,
The confusion of caring for you with a broken heart.

How many days did you say you wanted? Forever?
Three hundred and sixty five days and then never.

As I Have Done

To dream that way of life,
Their time I never knew to have,
Save for what I wanted on my own,
Each moment passes with a wave.

Try as I might I could never guess,
What spreads hopes wings eternal,
Whenever I looked to future times,
I used to fear my own soul.

Better arrival of a better time,
A better way to think anew,
I'm more me than I've ever seen,
I'm more of me because of you.

I'm not going to break this heart,
Worrying my life away to dust,
Hopes and dreams and what I believe,
Overall I found it's all in trust.

Child of God

I want to be a Psalm writer,
I want to live like you,
I want to be a truth fighter.
And do all you do.

I want you to use my life,
To make me all I can be,
Through trials and strife,
Because you did even more for me.

I'm never going to be the best,
I'm always going to fall,
But I hope after every test,
You help me to stand tall.

I will try to help other people,
Even though the world is defiled,
Because you saved my soul,
And I am always your child.

Night's Secret

Let talking evolve to whispers,
Darkness envelopes every word,
Cease endless trivial talk,

Don't think of things you may have heard.

For when the stars glisten down,
And the moon shines bright,
The velvet of the black sky,
Creates whispers of the night.

As when the wind blows into your ear,
And you let the horizon capture you,
What are words when you have the night?
God has given you silence to start anew.

Don't run away from the quiet,
There was never anything to fear,
Yes, you'll be alone in hidden black,
But mystery is a gift when you're here.

The rustling wind as a gentle breeze,
Ever changing in its esoteric tones,
But with hundreds of stars to guide you,
You have never really been alone.