Five Years

Five years of my life that felt more like thirty, 

Five years of my life that I won’t get back, 

All the long and tiring days that we spent on this, 

The minor victories but the successes we lacked. 

When I was eighteen I felt like a failure, 

Eighteen years old and my path wasn’t clear, 

Every day has been a struggle since then, 

But it doesn’t matter as much when you persevere. 

Now I’m almost 23 and breaking the statistic, 

Of people graduating from ages twenty-one to twenty-two, 

Five years of my life could’ve felt like a lifetime, 

But it’s been better since I’ve met you. 

Twenty years old when I saw you in that hallway, 

Twenty years old with three more years till now, 

You still believe that I am absolutely amazing, 

Every day I look at you and wonder how. 

Yesterday you looked at me and said “can you see the light?” 

I smiled and said “almost” but I knew, 

It didn’t matter if every day was painful or difficult, 

Because the light is shining more when I’m with you.

Tenacity

Believing in our strength of mind,

Adaption devoid of conforming,

Take a stand for your thoughts,

Give the truth, walk the line.

When the sky is at its darkest,

And you're searching for light,

I'll be the candle in the window,

Easing you away from the night.

If I can promise you something,

I promise to always try,

Even when things are murky,

The world is full of terrible lies.

I'd break the sky apart to find you,

Revealing the light through the trees,

Just to wake up knowing reality,

The ground cracks by roaring seas.

Dreams are dreams and we awake,

To find out persistent certainty,

I'm waking up to find strength,

The truth of us in sincere clarity.

Veracity

You're much more than a leap of faith,

Stronger than the deepest rivers, 

You're an adventure waiting to be had,

And a thousand stories to be told.

I am not a believer of false promises,

Trusting only in what is stable,

Unwilling to be broken and bent,

Unless it's into a better shape.

We are more than what the world expects,

Dreamers of amazing dreams,

We could watch a thousand sunrises,

And still want to be by each other's side.

Disclosure

As the world is ever turning,
And my soul continues burning,
From deep down the heart that wants,
Past memories that shame and haunt,
Believing I'm lost only to find,
Everyone else has left me behind,
For the sake of the damage I brought,
And the lies in which I've been caught,
Too many times am I lonely at night,
Trying to abate my ever growing fright,
This crusade of fighting the isolation,
Too destitute to find any foundation,
As those hopes and dreams slip away,
Worse still into the harsh light of day,
Ever lonely I seek to discover,
The hope of love within another,
Perceiving the very darkness I fear,
In the people I've held so near,
I cry and I ache for the pain to subside,
Only to find deep down inside,
Through the seeping darkness above,
I have to believe I am worthy of love.

Seasons of Heartache

This time we are all breaking,
My heart in rhythm of his,
I'm in the season of aching,
I can't do better than this.

If I sink further down in myself,
I'll never be found again,
Placing my heart on the highest shelf,
Only to see if I don't have to begin.

Beating myself up to pieces,
Trying to make it better,
The way my heartbeat ceases,
Remembering you and I together.

Seasons of pain in everything I do,
More pain than I've ever known,
Heartache to me is nothing new,
But I've never been this alone.

Caught

Caught somewhere in the middle,

Roughly treated like a sinner,

For the mistakes of an entire body,

Crammed down to an ingrained society.

For them treating you like a leper,

And they will never treat you better,

Just because of a woman's heart,

Never knowing it would fall apart.

For what it's worth you are more,

Regretting it still as I walk out the door,

Yes, flawed and ruined nonetheless,

To us our lives would have been perfect bliss.

I'm sorry for the way we turned out,

Your head was spinning round about,

Love cannot love under such disdain,

Of the way you are shackled in chains.

My life is my own I promise you that,

But to you and I seemingly mistreat,

We weren't an exception we are scarred,

And I'm so sorry it had to be this hard.

The Coldest Truth

Follow me into the deep dark,
Words we trapped in tight lips,
All for a better tomorrow,
Feigned because we need to believe.

A dream better than our reality,
Shallow and hallow down inside,
Because we broke too many times,
We can't confront our reflection.

I'm born a beautiful little sinner,
You're born a broken lost boy,
We broke the codes of realism,
And broke ourselves to do so.

Turn us around and crash us down,
Follow me again to a broken road,
I can crush your heart in front of you,
And then console you as you ache.

No more mornings no more adoration,
We tore up our own promises again,
I trusted you with every piece of me,
Now I collide with reality once more.